Thursday, March 12, 2009

I'm Sorry, So Sorry


Remember this "hurtin" song, I'm Sorry, by Brenda Lee? Okay, some of you may be too young, but the theme was apologizing.

You tell me mistakes
Are part of being young
But that don't right
The wrong that's been done

I'm sorry
So sorry
So sorry
Please accept my apology...

You may have seen yesterday that Ontario has joined other provinces in passing a law that allows people to apologize without risk of lawsuits. Read this from the Toronto Star:

Ontario became the latest province yesterday to adopt an apology law that will allow people to say they're sorry without fear of having it turned against them in court.
Under the new rules, apologies can't be used as an admission of fault or liability and won't affect someone's insurance coverage – a move critics warn may do victims more harm than good.
Fewer people apologize because they're afraid it could come back to haunt them if they are sued, Attorney General Chris Bentley said after the bill passed final reading.
British Columbia, Saskatchewan and Manitoba have similar apology laws, and 35 U.S. states have some form of apology legislation.

I am on the Bowmanville hospital Pastoral Services Advisory Board and realize that the issue of accepting responsibilty for making mistakes is a major issue for medical professionals. Physicians in Ontario hospitals are now legally compelled to admit mistakes even when there are no negative medical consequences, but there is concern about the possibility of litigation. This law would help to address this.

Lent is a season when saying sorry is a major theme. The psalm for Ash Wednesday is always psalm 51, which is King David's admission of guilt and plea for forgiveness. We "talk the talk" of confession and forgiveness in the Christian community. The assumption is that our "sorrys" must be sincere and heartfelt.

What do you think about this law? Will it just let the guilty "off the hook?"How do we measure the level of sincerity in apologies?

1 comment:

Deborah Laforet said...

It sounds like a good law, and yet, it is disheartening that the government has to get involved in the way we apologize to each other. I believe apologies are a lot of work and need to be felt by both the receiver and the giver. Both parties are not always ready at the same time, and sometimes the receiver needs more than just an apology of words and the giver needs to fully understand what the receiver needs.

In many ways, I think we have forgotten how to do apologies. The process brings to it a lot of openness and vulnerability. It's not easy.

Government legislation? Well, in some cases it might work, but I'm sure it will make things worse in other cases.