Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Farewell to a Friend





Last Thursday we said farewell to a long-time friend. He was always there for us, seemed to love our company, and when he was happy --which was most of the time -- he purred. Yes our sixteen and a half year old cat Bustopher finally succumbed to the cancer which caused his weight to drop steadily since the Fall.

Sixteen plus is a good run for a cat, and he did have numerous lives. Born in Sudbury, Bustopher flew to Halifax to join us after we had driven there. He disappeared for eight days while we were in our second home in that city and reappeared as mysteriously as he disappeared, meowing at the patio door in a blinding rainstorm. Not long after we moved to Bowmanville he was on death's door due to a serious infection. But the cat came back from the brink, and lived the second half of his life with great contentment.

I'm not going to let on too much about my tears or those of my family, although we just couldn't help ourselves. When he got to the point where he could barely stand and couldn't eat or drink we went to the vet. I hate aiding and abetting an execution but I do feel that his death was merciful. We were forewarned that it could take up to fifteen minutes but it was more like fifteen seconds.

For us Bustopher was a gift from God. I don't say that glibly. He spent countless hours on my lap and petting him was both therapy and a grace. The sound of his contentment brought me peace in troubled moments. Many a time when I slipped out of bed in the wee hours with the weight of the world on my shoulders, he would be there seeking a little TLC. Then the world wasn't quite so daunting. He didn't get it that the good times could all come to an end in a hurry. He just lived in the moment. Didn't Jesus point us to the flowers and the creatures as examples when he told us not to worry?

I do appreciate that he was a cat and that I am a human. Pets don't go on forever, nor do we in this life, and we hear that Bustopher's two remaining siblings are also failing in old age. I also recognize the irony that I have munched many an animal yet decided to love others as members of my family. I can't claim that I am always logically consistent!

All I know it that I have blessed many a companion animal in our annual Blessing of the Animals services but in the end I'm grateful that our companion blessed us.

Any observations about the animals who have been your companions along the way?

7 comments:

IanD said...

That's really a shame, and I'm so sorry for your loss.

It's terrible losing pets, and that's why I'll probably never have another one (outside of fish.) We lost our family pooch in 1997 after 14 years of loyalty and great memories. Putting her down was what my dad called one of the hardest things he ever had to do.

Losing pets is hard, I think, because they are, in the end, companions for us. As you point out David, anyone (human or otherwise) that can make the journey a little easier for us is bound to endear themself to us. It's a wonderful thing, and only tough during the end game.

Hang in there!

roger said...

Very sorry to hear about your pet, David.

Our pets are part of our family, and to people who don't have pets, they sometimes wonder why we make such a big deal when we lose them. But it is a loss, and a painful one. We miss their companionship and their personalities.

Growing up, we had a cat that lived to 19, and we too had to put her down. My strong, war vet father said it was one of the worst things he had to do. That visit to the vet was very emotional.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for your loss. As you know we recently lost Toto who was a complete joy to us for nearly 16 years. We still miss Dorothy who died a few years ago, so it seemed impossible to be here again.For a long while it seemed our Toto was immortal because she lived so long with heart disease [2 years longer than the norm actually] But after several strokes we decided it was time and like you we knew it was merciful but still so difficult. Our knees buckled and we couldn't breathe as she died.

It really gets to the point where you realize you are keeping the pet alive for your own benefit, either because you can't bear the parting or because you don't want to make that decision. My niece lost her pug on Christmas Day. The four young ones [well they are all reaching their 30s but...] all went in together and stayed with Yoda until the end. It was a sad Christmas but my neice knew the alternative would be to let her little one suffer all through the day. It would not have been in Yoda's best interests.

We adopted Avery from the Humane Society, really in Toto's honor. She was such a great dog. My neice has a new pug puppy named Roxy. We both thought it was worth doing all over again despite the pain of knowing we will be at this point again.

Laura said...

Chevy , our 8 year old Retriever, went out to play just after we moved here, and his hips just gave out, without warning. With little chance of "repair" we had to make the decision to let him go. I didn't feel very adult. I cried spontaniously for weeks.

Chevy had arrived in our lives as we left our Ontario "home" and headed West, and just weeks before our first daughter was born. He generously moved down the totem pole with each baby born.

The Christmas after he died, a framed photo with a page of "lessons learned from a dog named Chevy" was under the tree. There were many lessons but felt "Love your family with all your heart and take whatever love they can give you back" summed up his life so well.

We didn't last long without the love of another Retriever in our lives. Yukon timed it better. No babies and three older kids who think he is perfect and dote on him.

We gave our Yukon an extra squeeze when we heard of Bustopher's passing. Life is fragile.

Martha said...

I appreciated reading your reflections David, and could identify with many of your descriptions of the gifts Bustopher gave you. Our retriever Corey gifted us with such faithful love, many laughs, comfort in petting him, and a happiness in just having his company - both inside the house & out. He has left a dog shaped hole in my heart, but I am so thankful for the 10 years we had him.

I have been thinking/praying for you & Ruth in walking through this loss.

Nan said...

Losing a pet is like losing part of your family. We are so sorry to hear about Bustopher. Growing up, my mom always had a cat and my dad his beautiful labs and retrievers. When we were first married, we lived outside of town and we got a dog as company for me when my husband was taking courses. Shortly after that we found a cat in our garage. He was in pretty bad shape and we fixed him up and kept him. Our kids grew up with these pets and not only loved them dearly, but learned responsibility as they fed them, walked the dog and cleaned the litter box. When they died, we lost two very special family members. There is something about a pet. They love you unconditionally and take over a big piece of your heart.

David Mundy said...

It says a lot that so many of you responded with reflections on your own pets, past and present. They really do make a difference in our lives. Which as you point out is probably why we venture into new relationships after we experience loss.

I appreciate your kind thoughts as well.

Thanks for joining the conversation Martha.